Before I snark this article, please know that I support our troops and no amount of political posturing will make me turn my back on our men and women in uniform. Whenever I see a soldier, sailor or marine in uniform, I thank them for their service. My father and two uncles served during Vietnam. My grandfather served during WWII and my grandmother served in the WAC. At this moment, I have several friends overseas fighting this battle. I’m also proud member of the American Legion.
I support the troops—let me make that very clear and I don’t give a damn what you think about the war. I support them and they hold a special place in my heart. Whether or not I support the war is NOT the question. Our sons, daughters, mothers, fathers, aunts, uncles and friends are over there and I will always support them. Period.
However, the people in uniform that make decisions and give sound bites make me hike an eyebrow.
Start snark now…
This_article makes me question the abilities of some people.
Quote: A transport helicopter that…was brought down by a "sophisticated piece of weaponry," the U.S. military said on Wednesday.End quote:
And all this time I thought our men and women were being hit by sticks and stones. I’ve been wondering why this war has been doing on so long. Now I understand we’re not using cruise missiles against spears.
Of course it’s sophisticated, it shot down one of our helicopters. I’ll just file this sound bite under “shit I already know.”
Quote: The military initially said mechanical failure was probably to blame.End quote:
If you really think about it all crashes are from mechanical failure. What causes the mechanics to fail is a different story.
“Bill, what made the chopper crash?”
“Well, I do believe it was mechanical failure.”
“Ya don’t think it has anything to do with this big o’le hole in the side and the three missing blades?”
“Maybe we need to call CSI?”
Quote: The high number of U.S. helicopters lost in less than a month has raised questions about whether insurgents in Iraq are using new tactics, such as studying aircraft flight patterns, or have acquired sophisticated weaponry.End quote:
Those sneaky bastards. How dare they pay attention to our tactics! Let’s file this under “shit I would have expected.”
Quote: [Chief U.S. military spokesman in Iraq, Major- General William Caldwell] was speaking during a news briefing that concentrated on U.S. claims that Iranian-manufactured weapons are being used to kill U.S. troops in Iraq, but he insisted he was "not making any inferences" about where the weaponry had come from.End quote:
The Major-General will tell us where they weapons were made, but he’s not willing to go out on a limb and link “where made” to “where from.” Perhaps he hopes that Iran outsources its weapon distribution?
Quote: The military, which relies heavily on helicopters to transport troops and equipment to avoid Iraq's dangerous roads, has said it is adjusting its tactics in the wake of the downings.End quote.
And it took 7 downed aircraft and 17 hit aircraft to reach this conclusion? I’ll file that under, “shit that should have been concluded sooner.”
Quote: But at least two of the seven helicopters downed since January 20 appeared to have been deliberately targeted.End quote:
My god, you mean that our enemy isn’t just randomly shooting their weapons? Firing them off willy-nilly? They’re actually taking aim! OMG! The scoundrels! We’re at war; of course, our helicopters will be “targeted.” I’m filing this under “shit I would have expected.”
Begin quote: "We are engaged with a thinking enemy...They understand the strategic implications of shooting down an aircraft," he said.End quote.
Wait—you mean we’re not fighting drones over there? All this time I thought we were up against robots who were acting under programming. OMG! A “thinking enemy” whatever shall we do? Quick contact George Lucas and tell him the clones won’t be needed! We need to fight thinking with thought!
Damn them! Why couldn’t they be lemmings?!
Filing this under “shit I would have expected.”
I read articles like this and I shake my head. War news shouldn’t be humorous. In a way it’s sad and it makes me worry for our troops for a whole different reason.