Monday, July 09, 2007

The Problems with having a Priest Fetish

There are several problems associated with having a priest fetish. First, it's DAMN hard to find good priest erotica. As a general rule, I won't publicly complain about someone else's writing. I feel that's unprofessional. However, I've not liked most of what I've found and what I have liked is from a writer who REFUSES to post her stuff and share it with the world (or try to get professionally published.) So, if you know of some good gay priest smut, PLEASE, tell me.

The second problem is that it's difficult to take religious matters seriously if you have the visual. My religious path is an odd mixture of this, that and the other thing. Lately, I've been considering attending mass, because it's one of the few I haven't attended in person. Do you have ANY idea how difficult that is when you find all that imagery a turn on? >.< I can't even look for churches with old and unattractive priests, because the imagery is STILL there.

Another problem is trying to keep it hot without being sacrilegious. The beauty of religious erotica is that it is not blasphemy.

Yet another problem is figuring out which storylines are played out. Is a timid torn priest tired or is an aggressive, assertive and confident priest tired? As a general rule, I do not like the erotica that has the priest going from "hello" to opening his robes in a breath. That destroys my willing suspension of disbelief and as I'm getting to know some priests (yes, I'm actually making friends with priests. No, I do not hide my priest fetish. Yes, I'm being smart and friending only gay priests. *sweatdrop* And that just might be backfiring on me. Oh it's helpful to prevent anything physical from happening, but my MIND is running so fast I can't keep up with it.) But, as I'm getting to know some priests, I'm finding out that they aren't anything like I expected. The percentage that actually keeps that promise of celibacy is…well…small enough to REALLY make you wonder about those seminaries.

This is further complicated by all of the "it's no fun if…" stuff. It's no fun if the priest is a non-celibate priest. (Yes, there are Catholic priests who have not taken a vow or promise of celibacy.) It's no fun if they aren't Catholic priests (Episcopalian priests have the right look, but none of that forbidden fruit thing going on.) It's no fun if they aren't in that SEXY collar and don't even get me started on how unbelievably sexy cassocks are. *bites knuckle* It's no fun if they're straight. Yes, there are plenty of people out there who fully appreciate the sexiness of a straight priest, but for me I want that straight priest either being pursued by another man or longing for one (even if it's just idle curiosity and exploration.)

It also makes it damn hard to write a sex scene with Father Daniel. I want him in his clerical shirt for it, but I also don't want to force that into the story. Also thinking about him tied up on a bed all wanting and full of lust is enough to…well…let's just say you DO NOT, repeat, DO NOT write good erotica one-handed. (Take care of business and then return to the writing or write it and then take care of business, but do not do both at the same time.)

As you can obviously tell, I'm really picky about my priest erotica. Can anyone else feel my pain with this?

EDIT: (updated:4/1/2011)

Judging by the stats, this is a very popular post. It seems a lot of people are seeking religious erotica and/or priest erotica. I have a short (and cheap) title out called Personal Demon .

Here's the blurb:

Temptation in an alb...

Those of the most devout faith face private struggles. When the man inside the priest fights carnal desires, the priest can only pray he has the inner fortitude to resist. Eve succumbed to the serpent. Adam succumbed to the apple. Now, Father Blake Krey stands in a private Garden of Eden tempted by his own Personal Demon.

If you read it, I hope you enjoy it. If you don't read it, I hope you find something that you do enjoy.

16 comments:

PJ said...

Kinda, I have a thing for monks.

And there was a chaplain at the university where I used to work; there was something about him. I think it must be the purity - I want to taste the untainted.

IM Cupnjava said...

PJ,

You've just summarized the beauty of religious erotica. "Tast the untainted." Mmm...so freaking good!

Anonymous said...

AMEN! (No pun intended) I was really suprised when I started looking for religious erotica online and couldn't find any good stuff. It's hard to find any at all, and the little I found was all really trashy. The whole allure of innocence/purity is destroyed if he's a gross, depraved, sadistic old wretch. I want them young, beautiful, and sincere like Father Greg in the 1994 movie Priest, you know? Good to know I'm not the only one out there with a thing for a guy in a roman collar!

IM Cupnjava said...

Anon you are so right! I started writing priest erotica before I saw that movie, but that movie is part of the reason I keep writing it. Priest was hot, kept true to the faith, kept true to characterizations and provided a good story. Those are the kinds of stories I want to write.

Anonymous said...

and have you guys seen "quills" with joaquin phoenix in it? The ultimate sexy priest.

hoskie said...

I too am looking for gay priest smut (how I ended up here, actually!). If you ever find any, let me know.

What I have found in my travels are:

- The 1994 film, Priest in which there are a few hot scenes between Linus Roache and Robert Carlyle.

- A porno called Our Tresspasses, which I actually have yet to watch...

- And an AU fan fiction for Stargate Atlantis called "Revelations" that casts the character John Sheppard as a priest and Rodney McKay as his corrupter. It's pretty hot even if you're not familiar with the characters.

... and that's about it, sadly.

codevixen said...

hoskie, thanks for the link... that story was awesome. Also, if anyone's interested, Stephen Lynch has a song called "Priest" that really hits the spot. You can find it on YouTube or purchase it outright.

Anonymous said...

Wow I thought I was alone in my fetish. Of course mine is actually for Bishops, Cardinals, & Monks.

Anonymous said...

Seriously, it's times like this when I love having the Internet around. I, too, have a priest fetish, but there's an added level of complexity because I am a very orthodox Christian. I attend church roughly five or six times a week, but had to stop going to confession because a) cassocks are aphrodisiacs in fabric form (just look at all those buttons...) and b) well, it's rather awkward when someone is granting you absolution and you're still sinning! Anyways, thanks for this post, I feel like less of a freak now. :)

Anonymous said...

I have fetish for priests with straight women. Clarimonde with Audrey Benoit as succubus and David LaHaye as Catholic priest was very erotic (book is classic!) But good stuff is so hard to find! Some is more porny than erotic, all the sleazy juvenile details and smutty dialogue kill eroticism...

chester said...

Interesting post. My own writings eroticize and sexulize priests and religious ritual, but I refuse to accept that they are blasphemous: the intensely spiritual and intensely sexual can coexist.

mlb said...

I'm glad I'm not the only one with this fetish! I personally don't mind if it's gay or straight, just as long as the sincerity and struggle is there. I've recently read a very good ebook about a relationship between a priest and one of his male parishoners called "Me and Mine" by Sarah Goodwin. It's VERY good, and very long for being only 99 cents. I would definitely give it a read, and review it for her so she'll write more like it!

If any of you have recommendations, I'd love to hear them!

Teja Van-Jae. said...

Thank god i have found at least a few other people that share my 'tastes' as it were ;) all my freinds laughed so hard at me when they found out, (and they found it even funnier because im really not a religious person at all and actually lost my scholarship arguing with my headmaster about it ;)) - but seriously, a roman collar could quite possibly be the sexiest thing on this earth...
not really sure what it is that is so damned attractive about them... might be the whole 'forbidden fruit' thing or something ;) but anyhow - ive noticed a similar thing with the novels situation, - and have actually written one or two (more like short stories really) - but i was wondering if there was any place i should maybe post them? y'know, get some critique etc...

IM Cupnjava said...

We are indeed not alone in our love of sexy men in a collar and under vows. There's something about them that's just irresistible!

Jess Albee said...

Mine whole thing started with the movie Stigmate with Gabriel Byrne, but there was a priest at the school I attended and I would have loved to get to know him more. I just feel weird about it and am glad I'm not the only one.

JTMac said...

I would love to find an older priest to jack each other